The parrot......

[BillyBob]

A Very quiet, conservative man owns a parrot. But the parrot is not quiet or conservative at all. He can swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself and this bird's foul mouth is driving him crazy.

One day, it gets to be too much, so the guy grabs the bird by the throat, shakes him really hard, and yells, "QUIT IT!" But this just makes the bird more angry and he swears more than ever.

Finally the guy says, "OK for you." and locks the bird in a kitchen cabinet.

This really aggravates the bird and he claws and scratches and squawks, and when the guy lets him out, the bird cuts loose with a stream of invective so embarassing that he has to throw a blanket over the bird so the neighbors won't hear.

At that point, the guy is so mad that he tosses the bird into the freezer. For the first few seconds there is a terrible din. The bird kicks and claws and thrashes. Then suddenly it gets very_very quiet.

At first the guy just waits, but then he starts to think that the bird may be hurt. After a couple of minutes of dead silence, he's so worried that he opens up the freezer door.

The bird calmly climbs onto the man's out-stretched arm and says, "Awfully sorry about the trouble I gave you. I will certainly do my best to improve my vocabulary from this point on."

The man is astounded. He can't understand the amazing transformation that has come over the parrot.

Then continues the parrot, "and by the way, what did that chicken do?"